At 57, Jennifer Lopez seems to have decided that a man does not need a private jet, a fancy watch, or an exotic car to catch her attention.
Even something as simple as a dishwasher might do the trick. Just before her 57th birthday on July 24, Lopez shared a refreshingly honest view of what she finds attractive in a partner during her performance at Dolce & Gabbana’s Alta Moda event in Sicily.
Lopez’s comments immediately opened her up to scrutiny. After years of high-profile romances with wealthy, successful men, some people saw her statement as proof that her priorities had changed.
Others had a simpler reaction: with four divorces behind her, should anyone really be looking to J.Lo for relationship advice?
Jennifer Lopez Says Money Is Not What Makes a Man Sexy
Lopez admitted she likes expensive things and can buy them herself. Still, she said that wealth is not what truly attracts her to a man.
She brushed off the idea that a watch, a car, or even a private jet really creates attraction. Instead, Lopez said: “It’s seeing them make the bed in the morning or wash the dishes for you when you’re tired at night.”
The crowd responded with laughter and applause. Her main point was clear. Lopez does not need a man to pay for her lifestyle, so things like being attentive, putting in effort, and sharing everyday chores mean more to her than another expensive gift.
For the average guy watching the clip, there was also a surprisingly encouraging message hidden in her words.
Maybe he does not need a private jet after all. Maybe just remembering to empty the dishwasher before bed gives him a real chance.
Online reactions showed that many people agreed with Lopez. Those fans said the real appeal is often found in the everyday stuff: helping around the house, being considerate, and making a partner feel cared for rather than showing off wealth.
Four Divorces and Six Engagements Give Critics Plenty of Ammunition
However, there is one clear complication when Jennifer Lopez talks about successful relationships: her own history.
Lopez has been married four times. Her marriages to Ojani Noa, Cris Judd, Marc Anthony, and Ben Affleck all ended in divorce. Her divorce from Affleck was finalized in 2025. She has also been engaged six times, including her two separate engagements to Affleck, which are counted alongside Noa, Judd, Anthony, and Alex Rodriguez.
Critics quickly used her relationship history to question whether she has really shown that her advice works.
One commenter summed up the skepticism this way: “I’m not saying she’s wrong. I’m just saying she’s not high on my list of love advisors.” Others were considerably harsher, pointing directly to her four divorces or mocking the idea of an extremely wealthy celebrity explaining that money is unimportant.
It is an easy joke, but it does not really end the debate. Having four divorces does not prove Lopez is wrong about attraction, any more than being married once makes someone an expert. In fact, going through several failed marriages might help someone understand what they really want.
Celebrity matchmaker Alessandra Conti previously made precisely that distinction while discussing Lopez’s romantic history: “Falling in love and staying in love takes a completely different skill set.”
This might be a better way to look at Lopez’s recent comments. She is not just talking about what attracted her to men before, but what she now believes is important after her past relationships ended.
Relationship Experts Say J.Lo Has a Point About the Little Things
That part of Lopez’s argument is not as silly as critics might think. A partner who regularly helps with small things around the house may actually be sending a much bigger message. Psychologist Rasshi Gurnani summed it up this way: “The brain tracks patterns, not intensity.”
In other words, making the bed one time is not a magic way to win someone over.
What really matters is what these actions show: noticing when your partner is tired, helping out without being asked, and proving over time that a relationship is a partnership, not just another job for one person.
Consultant psychiatrist Dr. Ambarish Ghosh also said that small gestures can make a partner feel noticed and cared for, especially because they are simple enough to do often. There is also data to support this idea.
In a Pew Research Center survey of married Americans, 56% said sharing household chores was “very important” to a successful marriage. That put chores ahead of adequate income, which 42% considered very important. That is a point for Lopez—and the dishwasher.
But things get more complicated when observers look at what makes someone attractive in the first place, instead of what helps a relationship last.
Science Says Money Absolutely Can Make a Man More Attractive
If you take Lopez’s words to mean that money does not affect how attractive a man is, some of the biggest dating studies say otherwise.
A 2022 study published in Human Nature examined data from more than 1.8 million online daters across 24 countries. Researchers combined income and education into a measure of a person’s ability to acquire resources and examined how much romantic attention different profiles received.
Higher earners and better-educated users tended to attract more interest overall. But when researchers broke down the numbers, men gained far more from those advantages than women did.
Men who scored higher on income and education got about 255% more interest than those who scored lower. For women, the increase was about 103%.
This does not mean women only want rich men, or that money creates love. The study looked at education as well as wealth, and online messages only show first impressions, not long-term happiness.
Still, the numbers show that money and status can make someone more desirable.
A much larger body of cross-cultural research points in the same general direction. A replication involving 14,399 people across 45 countries found that women, on average, placed greater importance than men did on a prospective partner’s monetary prospects, while men placed relatively greater importance on youth and physical attractiveness.
So if you ask, “Does money ever make a man more attractive?” science says yes.
But Money Might Matter More at the Start Than Later On
This is where Lopez’s point starts to make sense again. Attraction, choosing a partner, and staying happy together long-term are not the same thing.
A rich, successful man might get more attention when dating, but his money cannot make up forever for being selfish, unreliable, or not helping out with daily life.
A 2025 study published in Scientific Reports found that both women and men evaluating possible long-term partners preferred highly ethical, less wealthy men to wealthier but less ethical men. The researchers concluded that ethical qualities could outweigh resources when people evaluated long-term mating suitability.
That difference is important. A private jet may help someone get noticed. It cannot make him considerate. A Rolex can signal success. It cannot wash the dishes.
A big bank account can take away many money problems that hurt relationships, but it cannot create love, trust, or a willingness to share the work at home.
So, is Jennifer Lopez Actually Right?
Mostly yes, but with a big exception. Jennifer Lopez cannot be wrong about what she personally finds attractive. Attraction is personal, and at 57, she has every right to say that a man who quietly helps around the house means more to her than someone showing off expensive things.
Lopez has a point, but the data adds an important caveat. Money may not be everything, but financial stability, education, and earning power can still affect a man’s appeal in the dating world. Several studies suggest that those qualities matter more in evaluations of men than in those of women.
But Lopez seems to be talking about something deeper than just who gets the most attention online.
After four divorces, six engagements, and years of public relationships, Lopez seems to be making a point about the difference between a man who looks impressive and one who actually makes daily life better. Her history gives critics reasons to doubt her, but it might also explain why her views have changed.
Money can make life simpler. Status can make someone more appealing. Success can open doors.
But once two people are living together every day, someone still has to make the bed and do the dishes.
At 57, Jennifer Lopez seems to have decided that the man who helps out might be the richest one in the room after all.
