Billie Eilish is opening up about some of the issues that she has faced in her life like never before. The 20-year-old music sensation is featured on BBC 100 Women list for 2022. The media outlet focused on inspiring and influential women from around the globe.
In her interview with the BBC, she revealed that growing up in front of camera lenses has left many marks on her. She is also dealing with impostor syndrome.
The California native went deep into the difficulties of being a girl in an industry where abuse of women is very common. The “Therefore I Am” singer has Tourette syndrome and synesthesia. She has also dealt with depression.
Despite the success and love of fans from everywhere, Eilish still has trouble feeling at ease in her own skin and gender.
She has revealed: “There was a specific period of time where I was in this pit of hopelessness about myself as I didn’t have much to look up to in terms of girls like me being taken seriously. I remember just crying in my bed because I was thinking about the kind of show I would want to put on.”
Eilish continued: “I would just feel so hopeless because I’m a girl, so I’m never going to be able to have a show like that, I’m never going to be able to be free up there and wild… perform in this way and be more physical and be more about the performance… I thought it would never happen.”
In the 30-minute interview that will air on BBC Three, Tuesday stated that she is constantly trying to find the balance between her feminine and masculine energies.
She said: “I feel the most powerful when I feel the most masculine in my life… I also can find power in femininity. It’s kind of a balance of both. Depending on how I walk and stand, and my clothes, and my face and my jewelry and my fingers and everything I am day to day.”
The “Happier Than Ever” artist added: “I like to feel more masculine than feminine; it just makes me feel better. I struggled with it for a long time because I wanted to feel feminine and like it, but I just didn’t really, but it’s finding moments when you can have that, and it feels good still.”
In all the despair, Eilish says a lot of progress has been made in the entertainment industry when it comes to women.
